Na conoravirus everybody dey talk now.

Tank God no be Buhari shit, Buhari mess, Buhari chop, Buhari no chop, Buhari marry, Buhari do, Buhari no do, Buhari dis, Buhari dat again.

Now, dem don use conokoko block our eye.

Broda go see broda for Lagos, e no go shake hand with am. See Naija wey we don dey use to embreast tipe tipe. But noting like dat now.

I hear say even for church, people no dey embreast again. I hear say dem don fashy all dose song wey dem go sing for church and all di member dem go shake hand and embreast.

Everybody dey behave like wood now, dem forget say body no be wood. We must embreast for Naija – corona or no corona, talkless of virus.

But true true, conokoko don make afraid catch everybody. Na Lagos own bad pass. Since dat Italiano land for Lagos, tings no be di same again. Nobody trust anybody again. Everybody don become suspect. If you cough first time, den second time, people go begin take one kind eye look you. Tori Olorun!

Na im make di order day wen I wake up, I find my guonguoro key tire. Na wen our two woman pikin – Bisi and Funke – don go JAMB lesson dat morning, na im dia mama tell me say na im hide my guonguoro key.

I ask am why, Bose tell me say afraid dey catch am. E say e no wan become widow overnight.

I ask am weda e hear say person wan kill me. My wife tell me say no be so, but na dis conora ting wey oyibo man bring come for Lagos, and my own work na orisirisi people I dey carry.

Bose say, e no go gree make I put my guonguoro for road till every ting die down. E say afraid dey catch am for me.

I ask Bose say, if I no work, how we go take chop. My wife say na im make e been talk dat time say make I allow am go do dat oyibo work for dat kalokalo place for hotel. Olorun Oba o! Bose, you and dat your oyibo kalokalo hotel night duty again!

Bose say make I no shout, say no be quarrel nau. E say na becos e love me as im husband and father of our two pikin na im make e no wan make I pemenow.

Bose hold my hand enter inside room. Di two both of us siddon for bed. E put im hand around my neck and begin look my eye ti-ti-ti. I come talk am for my mind say na anoder ting dis woman dey find, no be corona matter.

But wetin man pikin go do wen woman don over power am? Body no be wood nau.

Na so me and Bose come turn morning into night again. We begin do “bend bend sleep” till afternoon.

Bose don promise me say na so e go be everyday till conoravirus go back to wia ever e come from.

Make we jam again on Friday.

Tank you.

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.