My people, see di small tori wey I nack una di order day say I wan follow do delegate for Abuja make I follow collect dollars, na im di hole world begin write me orisirisi letter.

Na now I know people wey like me and vice versa.

Make una follow me read am:

Dear OGA MAT,

I read your sweet tori wey you nack wey you beg to follow be delegate. So, jus becos your two passenger dem wey you carry go drop for Balogun market talk as dem take collect dollars for Abuja as delegates, na im make you sef wan do?

Na wa for you o. You be original long throat. Why you no follow amu robber dem go rob make we know say you be follow follow?

Ephraim Enyinnaya,

Aba, Abia State

Dear OGA MAT,

You too like money, I swear! You talk say you wan follow be delegate, shey you get any party wey you be member? You tink say na everybody dem dey give dollars for Abuja? Shebi you talk di order day say Oga Sanwo-Olu wan send you go for seminar for America, why you no wait till den make you go make your own dollars? Sofri sofri find money o, abeg.

Morenike Ayuba,

Ile-Ife, Osun State

Dear OGA MAT,

I for like well well make you follow chop dose people dollars for Abuja. After all na our money wey dose people tief teletele. No worry, di real election dey come. Jus go join one better party. Tell dem say na you be di number one taxi driver for Lagos, dem go make you delegate, wallahi! But remember me wen di dollars begin flow o.

Abdullahi Sani

Ahmadu Bello Way,

Kaduna

Dear OGA MAT,

I don dey tink wetin I go bring for you wen I land for Naija next month. As I read your sweet tori wey you wan follow do delegate for Abuja becos of dollars, I come know di ting wey you like. No worry, calm down. Wen I land, I go call you make you come carry me for airport. I go pay you in dollar. Before I come, I go send you dollars make you take go book hotel. I go also send dollars make you use buy recharge card for your torchlight chinko phone wey we go dey take talk till I bring iPhone 13 for you. But promise me say you no go reach your house wey dey for Abule Egba troughout di one month wey I go dey for Naija. And you no go even go your garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge. Me and you go dey like five and six. And I go give you dollars make you take buy tear rubber and trowey dat your guonguoro. If you gree, send me your phone and bank account number.

Doris Broom

Florida, USA

Shey una see wetin I talk? If na you be me, which one you go take?

Make we jam again on Friday.

Tank you

Tank you very much

And tank you very, very much indeed.

*Credit: Matilda's Blog.