“No trust anybody for dis world” na di ting wey my papa been dey tell me wen I be small boy for my village for Ogbomoso.

My papa been dey take am draw my ear everyday before I run comot for village, come be mecho apprentice for Lagos, as Arike papa wan use African Insurance finish me say na me give im pikin belle.

And na di same ting I dey tell my two woman pikin dem, Bisi and Funke, every time.

Yesterday, I go drop one passenger like dat for Ketu. As I jus drop am finish, I turn to begin come back to our garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge.

I jus pass Ketu bus stop small, to take dat small link road take join old toll gate for Lagos/Ibadan Expressway, na im I hear puuaahh! Tori Olorun!

As di steering come dey do for my hand, I know say na my back tyre burst so.

And dat place near one taxi park after dat Olopa station for Ketu.

Na im I drive small small, enter di taxi park. Everybody for di garage come dey tell me “Sorry o, sorry o. Tank God say you no enter express before di ting happen.”

I come down and see say di tyre wey burst don scatter patapata. Olorun Oba o!

I open my boot, bring out jack and spare tyre. As I bend down to jack up my guonguoro, anoder taxi driver for dat garage don dey helep me loose di tyre knots.

In fact, na di two both of us change di tyre.

Na wen we don fix am finish, I say make I tank am, na dat time I see di person face, and di person see my face. Come see as we shout and embreast oursef!

Di person na Osagie wey me and im learn mecho work togeder for Olorunshogo for Mushin before Biafra war. Come see as we come dey do as we dey do dat time wen we be apprentice. But di ting me say, now me and Osagie don become agbalagba. Na today?

I ask am, “Osagie, so you still dey for Lagos?” Osagie ask me, “Femi, so you still dey for Lagos?”

I tell am say I been tink say e go don go back to Edo tipe tipe. Osagie sef say e tink say me sef go don go back to Ogbomoso tey tey. Na so we come dey talk about wife, pikin, house, work and everyting!

I come ask Osagie how e manage survive with im family for dat Coro time wen everybody dey inside house.

Osagie tell me say, if no be di palliative wey Oga Sanwo-Olu give all taxi driver for Lagos, say man for don peme dat time.

Oga Sanwo-Olu? Palliative? All Lagos taxi driver?

I do like say I no hear am well well. I ask Osagie make e repeat am again once more.

Osagie ask me weda I no know say every taxi driver for Lagos been get rice (1 bag), beans (1 bag), Indomie ( 5 carton), Semovita (5 big bag), Ororo (1 gallon)? E say di palliative even include envelope with N20,000 inside di envelop. Shiooorr!

Osagie say na all branch chairman for Lagos State dem invite go Alausa to collect di palliative for dia member dem. Osagie say if I no been collect my own palliative, make I go ask my branch chairman.

Come see as fly nearly enter my mouth as I open mouth down, dey listen to Osagie.

(To be continued)

Make we jam again on Friday.

Tank you

Tank you very much

And tank you very, very much indeed.