Man pikin don hear nwi for dis world wey we dey so. Noting wey person no go take eye see.

Dis our taxi driver work na im bad pass. Na orisirisi people na im we dey carry every day, and na orisirisi tings we dey see for Lagos road. Di kind tings we dey take our mouth see, our eye no fit talk.

We don dey manage am like dat until dis Koro matter show face. If I see dat ObaniKoro , I go ask am why e bring dis Koro come for Lagos.

Now, na so we go siddon for our garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge from morning till night, no passenger. Dem say make everybody siddon for house. Olorun Oba o!

Yesterday, wen I don siddon tiire for garage, around 12 o'clock pm in di afternoon, I say make I go Madam Shine buka wey dey near Airport Hotel. Atlist if I take like 2 bottle of My Usual, I no go tink too much about dis Koro matter. And I go also meet Sikiratu for dia. You know nau. (Smile)

As I reach Madam Shine buka, I no see anybody, dem don lock up every wia. Shooooh! Madam Shine no open by dat time to sell beer and pepper soup? I come talk am for my mind say someting serious go don happen.

Na im I bring out my chinko torch light phone begin call Sikiratu to know why dem never open. Sikiratu ask me weda I no dey for Lagos to sabi say Oga Sanwo-Olu don close all di market.

I ask Sikiratu wia e dey, e say e dey house. I tell am say make e come garage make we see, as e dey for by force holiday.

You know wetin dat Buka girl tell me? E say gofmen say make everybody do social distancing – person no near person, and body no touch body. E say if I tell am to come meet me for dis Koronavirus time, na im be say I no like am.

Na so I begin drive dey go my house for Abule Egba.

E be like say my wife Bose sabi say I hungry well well. As I jus park my guonguoro, enter house, my food don ready for table. And na di food wey I like pass - inyan with efo plus eja tuntun!

As I dey chop, my belle sweet me no be small.

Since our two woman pikin – Bisi and Funke – still dey holiday for dia aunty place after JAMB, as I chop finish I tell Bose say e get wetin I wan tell am, make we enter for bedroom.

Bose say e go come meet me for room, but make e first clear table wey I use chop.

Na so I enter room go wait for my wife.

Small time, Bose enter room with basin of soap water and one small bottle of ogogoro.

E tell me make I use di soap water wash my two hand, den use di ogogoro rub for hand well well.

I ask Bose wetin be all dis, e say na Oga Sanwo-Olu say make everybody dey do like dat for dis Koro time.

Na im I do as my wife say make I do, make peace dey for house.

Wen I wash and rub finish, I say make Bose come siddon with me for bed make we discuss.

Bose come hala for my head. E say im don sabi tipe tipe say I no love am. E say if I love am, why I go tell am make e come near me so dat my body go touch im body. E ask me weda I wan kill am with Koronavirus. E say weda I no hear of social distancing?

I come remember wetin Sikiratu tell me for afternoon wen I call am for phone. Na di same ting.

I come talk am for my mind say, so all Lagos woman dem don dey use dis Koro social distancing ting to run for bed?

So dem don turn social distancing to sexual distancing? No wahala.

Na so I carry my key, go enter my guonguoro. As I wan kick and move, Bose run come meet me. E ask me wia I dey go. I tell am say sebi na social distancing we dey do, say I wan go find one hotel stay till Koro finish for Lagos.

Bose put im hand around my neck, begin beg me make I no go anywia. E open my guonguoro door for me to come down. E hold my hand, and carry me straight to bedroom...

Make we jam again on Tuesday.

Tank you.

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.

Update news