In society, the media, and movies, interactions between opposite sexes are so sexualised that the concept of a nonsexual and compassionate relationship between a male and a female appears to be an absurdity.

Men are portrayed as predators on the prowl, waiting for the moment to take advantage of the opposite sex.

Men describe self as incapable of regulating own libido and, thus, will satisfy own sexual urge, wherever, whenever, and with whomever.

Women are perceived as sexual objects, that exist solely for the indulgence of men.

Women are said to be so emotionally weak that they readily succumb to the seductions of men.

These stereotypes of males and females record the experiences of the many, who do not engage in an interaction with the opposite gender without the introduction of intimacy.

Can a male-female, boy-girl, man-woman social interaction occur based on mutual respect and friendship, with no sexual strings attached?
<blockquote>Essentially, can one have a very close, longterm friendship with the opposite sex?

Yes, one can hold a memorable friendship with the opposite sex.</blockquote>

Better still, one can have a member of the opposite sex as one’s best friend.

To achieve this, there is a need to define a friendship and a friend.

To a Platonic lover, a friendship is an interaction of mutual trust, compassion, and loyalty.

This type of lover will not ever countenance a sexual encounter with a friend.

On no circumstance is the friendship love to be sexualised.

A friend is a person, whose company one enjoys without the need to exploit each other's sexuality.

A friendly social life that excludes a sexual encounter is termed Platonic, named for the Greek philosopher, Plato.

Plato ascribed an ideal friendship to the spiritual bond between friends, whose affection for each other has no element of physical attraction.

Such a spiritual connection strengthens Platonic friends, whose common psychology is founded on selfless love.

Cynics say a heterosexual male cannot engage in a friendly interaction with a female, without sexual attraction, and vice versa.

For a start, that is an erroneous assertion for a number of Platonic relationships.

Secondly, in the rare instance where such fantasies are entertained, they remain just that – sexual fantasies.

The normal response to such a fantasy is to note the potential damage to a promising relationship should that fantasy ever be realised.
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Sexual fantasies are designed to accord pleasure and, in many cases, not be implemented.

Should one sit back and recount all sexual fantasies of which one has thought, one will hardly find one to be revealed to others, let alone actualised.

In fact, should one divulge every one of one's sexual fantasies, one will probably gain the unwanted attention of security agencies or be put on the list of persons in need of an urgent mental healthcare.

The same sceptics see nothing wrong in a heterosexual male buying dinner for another heterosexual male.

The moment a male does the same for a female friend, sceptics assume there is a subtle sexual undertone involved.

The insinuations at a physical attraction go through the roof, in the instance of a female presenting items, of any sort, to a male friend.

She likes him. She wants him. She wants to sleep with him. She is latching on to him. She is desperate.

All of those will be some of the rumours developed and disseminated by persons under the illusion that others see nothing but a sex mate in the opposite gender.

Although a sexual favour is expected between non-Platonic friends in exchange for a nonsexual aid, such an expectation is not the reality among Platonic friends.

For Platonic lovers, assisting each other is a pleasure, conducted entirely for altruistic purposes.

Just as in any relationship of trust, Platonic friends offer each other pieces of sound advice and suggestions to remedy any crisis.

Platonic friends are not jealous of each other’s relationships with others.

Rather, friends discuss and advise each other on procedures to improve relationships with others.

This is in contrast to a friendship where one or both parties want to be more than friends.

In such a friendship, one party, say the male, will perceive any male partner of the female as a rival and a threat to his chances of having a sexual relationship with her.

The same is true in the vice versa.

The fallout from platonic love is the jealousy exhibited by those who do not comprehend the value of platonic friendships.

Such persons perceive their partner’s platonic friend as an undesirable competitor.

Such a misunderstanding can lead to a freezing of contact with one's partner, in the hope of blackmailing them into severing associations with their Platonic friend.

For the most part, both parties in a Platonic relationship do not acknowledge gender or gender roles in the friendship.

Thus, Platonic lovers treat each other as if they were of a single gender, and not opposite genders.

They discuss topics freely and are sincere with each other.

They protect each other and look after each other’s interests.

We wish all Platonic friends a historic and awesome experience.

•Umm Sulaim is the Publisher of Umm Sulaim’s Thoughts (https://iamummsulaim.wordpress.com).

Copyright © 2019 Umm Sulaim. All rights reserved.

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