Wen I reach house, I pack my guonguoro, enter bafroom and baf. Dat time everybody for house don sleep go. Food no come hungry me again as time don too go.

As I enter bed, Bose turn body. Me sef turn body face am. I take one leg cross Bose and use one hand dey rub am small small. One time, my kini jus jump up like snake head, fiaam.

Na so my wife jump comot for bed. E say weda I no know say we don dagba, wey I no go allow am sleep for night.

E open room door, go parlour go follow Bisi and Funke lie down for foam wey dem put for ground.

Na so I lie down for room only me, dey count ceiling dey go. Tori Olorun!

I come talk am for my mind say, no wonder old papa dem dey go marry small sisi dem.

Na dat yesterday night I decide say, today o, I must to announce vacancy for new wife.

Any under-22 dey free to apply. Di sisi front and back must to be medium size – not too big, not too small, not too tall.

I like black skin, but no be like charcoal o. I no wan yellow sisi ra-ra-ra. Dem dey resemble yellow fever. Make sure you go school reach DSS (Abi wetin dem dey call am?). And you must to be ready to be second wife.

Any sisi wey get all di tings wey I list so, see me for our garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge tomorrow for screening.

And come with application wey you take your hand write am.

Make we jam again on Tuesday.

Tank you

Tank you very much

And tank you very, very much indeed.

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